Are you even a Manc' girl if you don't smother your skin in St Moritz at some point in your life and wake up smelling of biscuits every morning. Or if you've never smothered your face with Laval 'foundation' - I'm pretty sure it wasn't foundation, it was definitely orange cement with a hint of … Continue reading R u even a manc girl?
So i'm one of those girlfriends (technically, I'm a fiancee now, but who's being specific?) that gets moody and stroppy when I don't get my own way, but in my defence, what girlfriend isn't? I expect you to know exactly what I want before I ask, and if you don't I'm pretty sure I'm gonna … Continue reading Biased girlfriend syndrome
Being a mum is the hardest thing I have ever done. It's true. I've worked in various job roles since leaving school and none of them ever came close! Most people think stay at home mums are lazy. "Get a real job, lying on the couch all day isn't hard work" - FYI if you've … Continue reading Its not all plain snail-ing
Dear fellow bus passengers, i'm sorry that my child will not stop howling on our way home this evening. I know its rush hour, you're all tired from work and the last thing you wanted to hear was a screaming baby - I'm tired too, and so is my son. We had to wait half … Continue reading Dear Stranger..
"Urghhhhh i'm knackered" said the little voice from the back of the car. Ryan and I smirk and glance at each other in shock. WHERE THE BUGGER DID THAT COME FROM?! Its one of them things isn't it. One day you're trying so desperately to get them to say "mama" "baba" "dada" and the next … Continue reading One of those days
Stretch marks, hormones, constant tears, midwives, scans and labour fears, Pushing, screaming, gas and air, sweeps and forceps, perineal tear, bed bound, korma shits, chest like boulders, should have expresses like the midwives told us. Baby weigh - turns out he's a chunky lad, health visitors tell us Johnson's creams are bad, peace and quiet … Continue reading The Baby-cycle Rap (you’re welcome)
Happy fathers day to all of the dads out there! The ones that miss out on gym sessions and a fun lifestyle to spend time tucking in their babies and reading Julia Donaldson books. To the dads that were 'too young' to have children and stepped up to prove the world that age is just … Continue reading If you’re a dad… this ones for you!
If my life was a movie, it would be perfect. I mean, it is in its own way - but like, you know the mum in Cat in the Hat? The one that fully has her life together. She has a perfect figure, shiny blonde hair, a job that she loves, a perfect house in a … Continue reading A Joan Walden kinda life ..
MUUUUUUUUUM.. Mum I'm hungry Dad I need a drink. DADDY I NEED A DRIIIIIIIIIIINK Guys I want a cuddle and a kiss. My feet are poking out of my blanket. MY FEET ARE POKING OUT MUM. HELP MEEEEEE Mum My DVDs gone off again (which is code for 'mum I purposely turned it off … Continue reading The frogs behind the radiator..
So Ryan and I are an odd pair. We are literally best friends and our true personalities only come out when nobody else is around. We're the kind of couple that would prefer to relax with an alcoholic drink and a curry on a Saturday night curled up on the couch watching a bit of … Continue reading wild nights in, quiet nights out